I’m writing this because I’ve been seeing unhappy people around me, and these people doesn’t even realize that they are not happy with how things are going in their lives. These people make others lives miserable as they thrive to create issues rather than live their lives to the fullest.
Circumstances can certainly make life unhappy. But a part, and often a big part, of unhappiness comes from our own thinking, behavior and habits. Here are some reasons why I think a lot of people are not happy with their lives:
1. Aiming for perfection – Life will never be perfect. The sooner you accept that, the better you will be. One doesn’t have to have a perfect hair, a perfect body, a perfect life to be happy. When we set the bar too high and we’re not able to get there, it usually leads to low self-esteem and feeling like we are not good enough even though we were able to produce fine results.
2. Living in a sea of negative people – It becomes a lot harder to be happier if you let yourself be dragged down by negative people. Who we socialize with, what we read, watch and listen to have a big effect on how we feel and think. Being with people that watch life from a negative perspective is tiring. We need to replace them with more positive influences and believe me, it can be like a whole new world opening up. So spend more time with positive people, inspiring music and books, movies and TV-shows that make you laugh and think about life in an optimistic way.
3. Getting stuck in the past and future too much – Spending much of your time in the past and reliving old painful memories, conflicts, missed opportunities and so on can hurt a whole lot. Spending much of your time in the future and imagining how things could go wrong at work, in your relationships and with your health can build into horrifying nightmare scenarios playing over and over in your head. Not being here right now in life as it happens can lead to missing out on a lot of wonderful experiences. Plan for the future, learn from the past but live in the now!
4. Comparing yourself and your life to others – One very common and destructive habit is to constantly compare your life and yourself to other people. If you compare cars, houses, jobs, shoes, money, relationships, social popularity and so on, at the end of the day you either pummel your self-esteem to the ground or you breed envy towards the people you compare yourself with. Just be happy for others’ achievements and see how much you have grown, what you have achieved and what progress you have made towards your goals. Remember that no matter what you do, you can pretty much always find someone else in the world that has more than you or are better than you at something.
5. Focusing on the negative details in life – Seeing the negative aspects of whichever situation you are in and dwelling on those details is not only a sure way to make yourself unhappy but also help drag down the mood for everyone around you. Just accept that things and situations will have their upsides and downsides rather than thinking that all things have to be positive and excellent. Accept things as they are. This way you can let go emotionally and mentally of what is negative instead of dwelling on it and making mountains out of molehills.
6. Limiting life because you believe the world revolves around you – If you think that the world revolves around you and you hold yourself back because you are afraid what people may think or say if you do something that is different or new, then you are putting some big limits on your life. There are also some people who get mad because they assume people are talking about them. What they don’t realize is people don’t care too much about what you do. They have their hands full with worrying about their own lives and what people may think of them instead. So instead of thinking about yourself and how people may perceive you all the time, focus your attention on the people around you. Don’t assume and just spread positivity.
7. Overcomplicating life – Life can be pretty complicated. This can create stress and unhappiness. But much of this is often created by us. Yes, the world may be becoming more complex but that doesn’t mean that we cannot create new habits that make our own lives a bit simpler.
Unfortunate situations aside, happiness is a choice. We only have one life to live, let’s not dwell on the negative things that happen or are happening to us, instead let’s be thankful of the blessings we receive and keep a positive outlook. Let’s spread love, peace and joy and this world would be a better place to live in.
The Domestic Goddess Wannabe 